the world is shrinking

you know that feeling you get when you see someone that looks familiar but you can't really place them? ya? well i get that feeling like everyday, 10Xs a day! this big town aint so big folks. either everyone is starting to look the same or i have seriously ran into everyone in this town on multiple occasions. its re-dic-u-lous.... i want anonymity, i crave it!! i don't wanna run into people i know, or people that know people that i know all the time!! lol. its time to pick up my roots. im sick of familiarity. im bored, and i need change!

*Like it was 1980*

i met dirt nasty... aka simon rex. it was amazing, he was shweaty... lol but umm ya, here's some pics.

hella fun concert with my betches!!

finding the BIGGER picture

some sentiments i try to live by are:
don't sweat the small stuff, look at the big picture, and at this point to risk sounding like a broken record, everything happens for a reason.
i don't try to preach or anything, but i really think that these are universal concepts because they pretty much apply to every situation imaginable. People, i think, tend to get caught up in the moment and tend to put too much energy into fretting over the little incidences that won't even matter 1 week, 1 day or even one hour from now. I think that we all tend to get caught up in ourselves and neglect to realize that there is a BIGGER PICTURE.

Before I went alumni from my sorority, I held the executive position which we called Pink Rose. It was, among other things, basically the chair of conflict management. I know it might sound ridiculous, but I learned a lot about the nature of people that semester. My motto became "Don't sweat the small stuff", and really, what isn't small? Everyone has their own problems, and all of us at times fail to see that others have problems just like ours. It's called empathy.

Think about it like this, we all have bad days, right? Well, next time you're having a bad day, rather than taking it out on someone and ruining their day as well, put things in perspective. I try and tell myself, when i start to feel overwhelmed or when my day takes a turn for the worse, that things can always be worse. It helps to give me perspective. I don't know if my theory works for everyone, but 99% of the time it works for me.

For example, I broke my phone recently, and i kept on complaining about it. But then i thought, well at least I have a phone. Better yet, at least I have people that care enough to call me so that I need a phone. It sounds silly, but honestly, if more people thought like this, i think there'd be a lot less drama and stress in all of our lives. Plus, it will give you a greater appreciation for things (not just material, I mean everything), and greater sympathy for those less fortunate.
I don't know really why I'm writing about this but next time I'm having a bad day it'll be good to look back at this I'm sure. Clearly, this attitude would have been advantageous prior to my last blog! lol...

Peace & sHibBy!

everything happens for a reason... or does it?

October 31st 2008---officially THE worst day of my life! without getting into too many details, i will say that it was the most humiliating, angering, and altogether shittiest day ever! as i've said before, i'm a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. it makes sense right? even if it's not apparent at the moment, i've found that in hindsight things eventually make sense or have a way of working themselves out. but sometimes, on the rarest of occasions, shit happens. and thats it. nothing more can come of the situation, just SHIT! there's nothing to be learned, nothing gained, nothing accomplished, yada yada yada. so anyway, my hunch is telling me im probably overreacting, and maybe, just maybe, there might be a small chance that i can gather something from the shitfest of that night. but right now i'm refusing to see things in that light. cynical, maybe, well yes actually, but i don't care. and for all the eternal optimists out there... save it! i don't wanna hear the rose colored glasses babble right now--it will only piss me off that much more. im in a "glass half empty" state of mind right now. bleh..... ya know what, i already feel better just letting that out. lol...

In the midst of history

i just got back from the polling place and i cant help but feel so excited and proud! i know it sounds a bit cheesy but we are truly witnessing history being made. i know that either way the chips fall our country will be changed. i just hope its for the better. i've never been too much into politics but i don't know one person who doesn't have a vested interest in this election. No matter who you vote for or who wins i just want to say thank you as one American to another. thank you for practicing the right that has been preserved for us through the sacrifice and perseverance of so many! but i just have to add.... GO OBAMA*BIDEN!! :)

Make a difference

the worst thing

i can't stand my mother. i know it sounds horrible and even reading it right now makes me cringe but, ....it is what it is. i've tried soo hard for soo long to get along with her but i am too tired to try anymore. every time i think that our relationship is on the mend she does something to f*** it up. for example, in the most recent event, she bought us concert tickets to see santana. great, i thought. family outing, could be shitty, might be fun. it's 50/50. anyway, it wasn't so bad. we had fun. we talked laughed. in a moment of beer soaked stupidity i actually opened up to her and had what i thought was a normal mother-daughter friendly conversation. i talked told her about how the worst thing she could do to upset me is hang the phone up on me (which she does about 75% of the time we talk on the phone) anyway, so you're probably thinking, fee concert doesn't sound bad right? well, how could i be so dumb? that evil incarnate of a woman basically spent the whole next day making fun of me. it's like every moment was an opportunity for her to make some dig like, "don't you remember last night?", or "that's not what you said last night" or "maybe you shouldn't drink so much", accompanied by a sickening smirk. are you kidding bitch? you force me to the bottle!!! un-f**kng-believable!

in another instance, she has completely offended my trust by snooping in my old room back home and reading my journals!! after i said the worst thing was hanging up, oh no she was determined to prove me wrong. and wow, she did! is there anything more violating than having your mother read your private personal thoughts and secrets? i despise her. its no wonder why i have such trust issues. im so pissed right now i can't even explain it. i can't trust her at all. if you can't trust your mother, who can you trust? needless to say we got into a huge argument. right now as i type this, she just stomped across the floor upstairs and slammed the door. a very mature and effective way to communicate "would you turn the volume down, please?" this woman is certifiable.... god help me. i cannot move back into this house. i will literally kill myself, possible someone else, likely my mother! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh